First off, there’s no such thing as true balance. To balance motherhood and career or a business is something to be mastered. We can’t hope to achieve balance if we’re at the point in our lives where we hope to be wildly successful and to succeed at being a mom. Motherhood and career balance can be managed over time with the right implementations. Over the course of time we have seen many women outwardly portray an ease of success and motherhood. They proclaim to have that working mom life balance that we struggle to figure out. If you’re like me, you’ve probably wondered how it was even a possibility. Like me, you were probably stuck under a humungous pile of laundry, dishes, throw up, chauffeuring the kids to drums, piano, soccer, tennis, lessons and that list could go on forever! How exactly does one maintain a semblance of a well run home and a thriving business or career? And being a good mom. Let us not forget that one. Several steps come to mind when I think of balance. One begets the other. That is the order of things.
- What is your ‘why’ for this goal?
- You must ask yourself, what am I willing to give up in order to become a ______________ ?
- Find out, What do I have to invest to become _______________?
- Outsource aimless To Dos. Figure out, What can I delegate or outsource that I currently do?
I know you are here for a purpose and reason. You have big hairy audacious goals that you hope to accomplish. To accomplish these goals, you must know the answer to the previous questions. More than likely, you have to give up your precious time. But what are those goals truly worth to you? Is it worth its weight in gold? Yes, you will have to sacrifice your sleep and perhaps time spent with friends and family. And that’s ok because if you are clear on your why, any how will not be too difficult.
Our why is the fuel to our goals. If you have a deep, passionate why that fires you up, you likely do not need motivation or to be inspired at every turn. That deep burning desire is what propels me to wake up before the sun has made an appearance and read for an hour. It is the same reason why I have made it my mission to write everyday.
I’m not afraid to admit that I begun writing my first book years ago. I wrote about six thousand words and became incredibly stalled. Low and behold, I had the most debilitating case of writer’s block. I was also being pulled in multiple directions and this ultimate goal of mine took the back seat. Two months ago, I solidified my why and I decided I would finish and publish my book. It’s September 20th, 2024 and I have written over forty thousand words of my rough draft. When you make the decision, it will all fall gracefully into place.
Become consumed with your purpose. You can’t be attending happy hour three days a week, socializing the rest of your free time and expect to win. That will never happen. Now if there’s a purpose to the aforementioned socializing that connects to your goals, go right ahead. You have to be intentional in your pursuit. Understand, you have to give up time and then use that same time to reinvest it where it will truly matter.
You must be crystal clear on your priorities. This will prevent procrastination and distractions. And there are many distractions in today’s world. Social media being the biggest. Turn those notifications off and turn your settings to ‘do not disturb’ on your phone when you are working. Go to your phone screen right now, swipe down and it will present the report of your screen time. Was your time spent aimlessly scrolling? Or are you addicted to being on your device, for whatever reason…Whether you play games or browse the internet for long periods of time, none of those things will push you closer to your destination.
I’m positive you have heard the saying, “fake it till you make it.” That very saying will need to be deeply imbedded in your mindset and thought pattern. If you are stepping into a space where you have no current presence, you will need to educate yourself and establish your expertise. How do you establish know how in a field you are now traversing? You do a project or two for free. I know, I have done it. You offer a deeply discounted rate and you show up for your clients like nobody’s business. You tell everyone you know what you do and you ask for referrals. You provide exceptional service so that when your prices revert to normal, you will not be questioned because you have the established history of going above and beyond.
My first job as a marketer was at my son’s preschool. I was asked to create a facebook and Instagram page for $150. And guess what? I took the project. I charged my next client over seven times that amount. I had no idea if they would pay, but he did it without question. Today, I charge thousands for the opportunity to do business with me. I understand my value and I am confident about what I bring to the table. You too must become so inundated with the confidence and competence of your area of expertise that nothing gets in your way.
Remember I mentioned the women who gave the appearance of doing it all without help? They lied. Simply put. No one who has attained a significant level of success is a one man show. There is definitely hired help. There is probably a team of people who manage the home and keep up with pressing matters. We are only humans. And while we are intelligent beings, we are not about to clone ourselves to fulfill every aspect of our lives. If only that were a possibility! Ask yourself, what can you outsource? An aspect of your household duties? Can you hire a maid to come in weekly or bi-weekly? Or can you rely on a friend or your spouse to help you with your kids? Ask for help. Forget your pride. Tough people make tough decisions and you are so seek out that assistance. Ask your mom if she can pitch in or explain to your spouse what your goal is and how it will positively impact your family.
Become solution oriented. If you only see problems, your life will continue to reflect said problems. Is it really worth your time to attend every meeting for your business? Can a team member do it instead? Do you need to sweep and mop the floors or is there a more productive use of your time?
If you can’t afford hired help, start seeking affordable help or delegate tasks as needed. When you do figure out your course of action, you need to back it up with an incredible amount of work, dedication and discipline. Nothing great was ever accomplished with minimal effort. Except for lottery winners! But you and I never win so back to the drawing board. This idea alone will help capitalize on the time you do have and to choose where you spend it. If that is with your partner and/or kids, guess what, you have just maximized your time. There’s nothing quite like quality time.
Balance is what you make of it. There will be times when you have more balance than other times and there will be moments you have barely any. It’s ok. Understand and embrace the sacrifice. There will be a day that you have more balance than you have while in the thick of it. Today is not that day. Today is the day you decide to fight valiantly for that why. We are here for a reason. Lean in to your purpose and do whatever it takes. The day will come when you are not scraping to find the time. Your investment in yourself is sending out massive vibrations and you will reap the blessings! Go get those dreams and goals!
