Every year, the start of a new year brings elaborately set goals, ambitious plans, and a surge of excited execution.
By March, many of us tumble—often gracelessly—off the wagon.
Cue Oprah’s voice: Every year, we shout to the heavens that this year will be different. This year is ours.
But is bold, extraordinary goal-setting actually the right approach?
What if we’re attempting the almost impossible?
What if we’re biting off more than we can chew?
And what if, without realizing it, we’re setting ourselves up for failure and disappointment?
When Motivation Turns Into Pressure
Let’s look at lived evidence.
Last year, I created three full sheets of goals. Yes—three. One focused entirely on writing. One was dedicated to wellness. The third outlined business goals.
On the wellness sheet alone, I had one major goal—but it came with five daily or weekly habits. Walk three to four times per week. Each walk at least 35 minutes long. Add multiple writing deadlines and ambitious business milestones, and suddenly I was managing several large goals at once.
One of my writing goals was publishing in 2025—and I did accomplish that through persistence, discipline, and effort. But here’s the truth that became impossible to ignore:
Progress felt heavier than it needed to be.
I wasn’t failing—but I was constantly stretched, negotiating with myself, and carrying a low-grade sense of pressure that followed me everywhere.
And that’s when the insight clicked.
The Problem Isn’t Discipline—It’s Goal Overload
We often assume that when goals fall apart, it’s a motivation issue. A willpower issue. A discipline issue.
More often than not, it’s a design issue.
When too many goals compete for your energy, even the most meaningful ones begin to feel burdensome. You’re not unfocused—you’re overcommitted.
The One-Goal Framework That Changes Everything
Here’s what I’ve found works far better—for high-capacity women, mothers, and leaders alike:
One large, primary goal per year—supported by three to four supplemental goals.
Think of your primary goal as the anchor. Everything else exists to support it, not compete with it.
Step 1: Choose Your One Large Goal
This should be the goal that, if accomplished, would make the year feel meaningful—even if nothing else went perfectly.
Ask yourself:
What outcome would move my life forward the most right now? What goal aligns with who I’m becoming—not just what I want to achieve? What goal feels slightly uncomfortable, but deeply purposeful?
If it feels too easy, it’s not stretching you.
If it feels impossible, it’s not respectful of your season.
The right goal sits in the space between challenge and capacity.
Step 2: Select 3–4 Supplemental Goals
These goals should support your main goal—not distract from it.
Examples:
A wellness habit that sustains your energy A skill that strengthens your professional growth A boundary that protects your time A mindset practice that builds emotional resilience
If a goal doesn’t fuel your primary focus, it doesn’t belong this year.
Step 3: Align Personal and Professional Growth
This is where most goal-setting falls apart.
You cannot separate who you are from what you do.
Improving mindset without tending to your body creates imbalance. Advancing your career without developing your skill set leads to frustration. Building success without boundaries breeds resentment.
The mind and body are intricately connected. Strengthen your physical foundation, and mental clarity follows. Learn a new skill—like managing customers more effectively—and customer retention increases naturally.
Aligned goals compound. Misaligned goals drain.
The Aligned Goal Checklist
Before committing to any goal this year, run it through this quick check:
Does this goal support my primary focus? Does it fit my current season of life? Will it stretch me without breaking me? Does it contribute to both my personal and professional growth? Am I choosing this from intention—not guilt or comparison?
If the answer is no to more than one of these, it may be a goal for another season.
Take a breath and ask yourself:
What would change if I stopped trying to prove my capacity—and started honoring it?
You don’t need more goals.
You need clearer alignment.
Confidence Is Built Through Follow-Through
Confidence isn’t created by setting bigger goals.
It’s built by keeping promises to yourself.
Each aligned decision reinforces trust. Each completed commitment strengthens your sense of self. Over time, that trust becomes confidence—not the loud, performative kind, but the grounded kind that doesn’t waver when things get hard.
This is a core theme in my book, Mom Take Center Stage:
You don’t step into confidence by doing more—you step into it by living in alignment with who you are.
When your goals reflect your values, your capacity, and your season, you stop chasing motivation—and start moving with clarity.
If this resonates, you’ll find these ideas woven deeply throughout Mom Take Center Stage—a book for mothers who are ready to reclaim their voice, confidence, and sense of self without abandoning the role they care so deeply about.
And for those who want to practice this work—not just read about it—my upcoming release The Center Stage Journal is designed to help you slow down, reflect honestly, and set goals rooted in self-worth instead of pressure.
Because alignment isn’t something you figure out once.
It’s something you return to—again and again.
Photo credit: https://unsplash.com/@glenncarstenspeters
