By the time the holidays arrive, many moms are already running on fumes. The calendar fills up faster than your energy can keep up. The pressure to make everything magical quietly builds. And somewhere between shopping lists, school events, family obligations, emotional labor (and let’s not forget physical labor), something starts to crack. Holiday burnout is real — and it doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful, weak, or doing motherhood wrong. It means you’re human.
Let’s talk honestly about what burnout actually looks like during the holidays, why it happens, and what you can do instead of pushing through until January.
What Holiday Burnout Really Is
Holiday burnout isn’t just being tired. It’s a mix of physical exhaustion, emotional overload, and mental fatigue that creeps in when expectations outpace capacity.
It often shows up when:
• You’re doing more while resting less
• You’re holding everyone else’s needs while ignoring your own
• You’re trying to meet emotional, social, and logistical demands simultaneously
And unlike everyday stress, holiday burnout carries guilt with it — because we’re “supposed” to enjoy this season.
Signs You’re Doing Too Much (Even If You’re Still Getting It All Done)
Burnout doesn’t always announce itself loudly. Often, it shows up in subtle, easy-to-ignore ways.
- You’re Irritable Over Small Things
The little things start setting you off. A spilled drink. One more request. A simple question that feels like too much. This isn’t a personality flaw — it’s a nervous system under strain.
- You Feel Disconnected From the Joy
You’re present, but not really present. The holidays are happening around you, yet you feel emotionally flat or detached. When joy starts feeling like another task, burnout is usually nearby.
- Your Body Feels Heavy
Constant fatigue, tension headaches, tight shoulders, trouble sleeping — your body is trying to slow you down when your mind refuses to.
- You’re Mentally Checked Out
You forget things. You feel foggy. Decision-making feels exhausting. Even choosing dinner feels overwhelming.
- You Feel Like You’re Failing — Even When You’re Doing Everything
Burnout often comes with harsh self-talk. Even as you’re doing more than enough, it still feels like you’re falling short everywhere.
Why the Holidays Hit Moms Especially Hard
The holidays amplify roles moms already carry year-round:
• Planner
• Caregiver
• Emotional regulator
• Memory maker
• Peacekeeper
Add family dynamics, financial pressure, grief, or unmet expectations — and the load becomes unsustainable.
Burnout will always happen because you’re doing too much for too many people, for too long. Recognize these patterns because mom burnout is unapologetic.
If burnout has reared its ugly head in your life one too many times and you need support, my book, Mom Take Center Stage can help you kick the habit for good. Find it on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Walmart and everywhere books are sold.
What to Do Instead of Pushing Through
Burnout doesn’t require a full life overhaul to heal. Small shifts can make a meaningful difference — especially during the holidays.
- Lower the Bar (Intentionally)
Not everything needs to be special. Not every moment needs to be magical. I have been guilty of this in the past. There was a time when I would jump through hoops to make every moment momentous for my kids. Instead, the better course of action is to choose one or two things that matter most — and release the rest without guilt.
Ask yourself:
If I did less here, what would actually be lost?
- Say No Without Over-Explaining
“No” is a complete sentence. You don’t need a reason that sounds acceptable enough. Protecting your energy is reason enough.
- Build in White Space
Schedule rest the same way you schedule obligations. Even 10–15 minutes of quiet can help regulate your nervous system.
- Stop Managing Everyone’s Emotions
It’s not your job to keep everyone happy. Discomfort doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong. Let people sit with their feelings without rushing to fix them.
- Listen to Your Body’s Signals
Your body often knows you’re burned out before your mind does. Tightness, fatigue, irritability — these are messages, not failures.
A Gentle Reframe for This Season
The holidays don’t need a perfect version of you.
They need a present, regulated, emotionally available version — and that requires rest, boundaries, and compassion.
Sometimes the most meaningful gift you give your family is a mom who isn’t running on empty.
You’re Allowed to Do the Holidays Differently
Burnout isn’t something to power through. It’s something to respond to with honesty.
This season, it’s okay to:
• Choose simplicity
• Redefine traditions
• Opt out without guilt
• Rest without having to earn it
Taking care of yourself isn’t stepping away from the holidays — it’s making space to experience them without resentment or exhaustion.
If you feel tired, overwhelmed, or emotionally drained, you’re not failing the holidays. You’re responding to a season that asks a lot — often too much — from moms.
And choosing yourself, even in small ways, is not selfish. It’s often necessary.
I’ve written a book that talks about mom guilt and burnout in detail. Find Mom Take Center Stage on this site, Amazon, Walmart, Barnes and Noble, etc. You deserve to live life for you too. There’s nothing wrong with choosing your purpose while you embrace motherhood.
The Center Stage Journal is coming soon. It’s a guided journal equipped to help you embrace confidence, self-worth, and true purpose.
Featured image credit: https://unsplash.com/@rstone_design
