Self doubt isn’t reserved for certain people. I think the majority of us humans have experienced self doubt. We’ve questioned ourselves; how we look, how we present ourselves and definitely made an internal spectacle of how others perceive us. Certainly, all of us in this boat wonder how to overcome self doubt.
Karen Salmansohn quite passionately says, “Ban, delete, shred, obliterate the words, I’m not good enough.” Because you are and doubt usually creeps in to test our sanity, our belief system and to challenge self love.
It shreds all the goodness of ourselves to display all the feelings and perceptions we epitomize. So what feelings and perceptions are we valuing when we doubt ourselves:
How We Look And Show Up
Our judgement is usually based on an untouchable glass ceiling of standards. What do I mean by this? We’re constantly comparing ourselves to people who we’ve essentially never met.
We’re mesmerized by this airbrushed, filtered, stock photoed version of their lives because we believe they’re beautiful and we simply can’t measure up. When in actuality this isn’t reflective of their actual lives.
We can’t see a bad day, or tears of joy or pain. We see the cropped, trimmed, beautified version presented.
That We’re Not Good Enough
“Not good enough” is a powerful set of words I heard this week from several people and these words have the power to debilitate us.
The only way to be good or great at what you do is to do. The only way to be good enough is to shred the belief that you aren’t.
You are the only person who has the might to pull you down, but also to lift you up!!
Success Is For Others, Not Me
Sometimes we have these irrational thoughts that others are made for success and we get to watch. Seldom do self doubters realize that if we flushed those harmful ideas about ourselves, those very people would be us.
Understand, that successful people were once people who doubted themselves and probably still do. They felt the way you feel and were able to get past the feeling of being less.
Here’s How To Overcome Self Doubt:
I am Vs. I’m Not/I’m Working On
Know thy self. Know with unquestionable clarity who you are. Draw a line down a sheet of paper, write “I am” on one side and “I am Not/I’m Working On” on the other.
On the “I am” side write all the talents, abilities and strengths which define you. If you’re an exceptional dancer or writer, then dot that down.
If you need help figuring it out, then ask 2-3 close friends or colleagues what strengths they recognize in you.
On the “I’m Not/I’m Working On” side write all the things that don’t define you or the areas you wish to grow. “I’m not a social media expert, but I can post authentic content two times per week” is an example.
Writing it out will give you the power to then decide what you choose to pursue, discard and/or value.
Be Authentically You
A huge aspect of self doubt comes from the unrealistic, for the lack of a better word, perfect lives of people online. We’re enamored and smitten by the visuals that have been tailored to reflect that magnificence we desire.
Truth is, you’re the only you and you’re here to make your mark. Alleviate doubts with empowering belief of your strengths. Show up with the confidence and authenticity that defines you. This world needs more real photos, videos, representations, meaningful words and the impact that only you could provide…
We need more people to be real and to show up themselves because they believe they’re making a difference every time they push past those mental setbacks.
Affirm Your Beliefs
Practice speaking good of yourself. If you’re always in a mental fight with yourself, then you’ll never win. The reason why you doubt yourself has a lot to do with the redundant programing that you’ve received from self, others and the environment.
I think it’s time we take back our fire, our undying love of self and our ability to inspire others by first and foremost inspiring ourselves!
Become aware that you’re always in your head and the way to mold the mind in the fashion of your choosing is to speak to self the way you expect to be spoken to…
Write out and keep those affirming strengths and beliefs. Carry them close to you always. Place them in your wallet or pocketbook. Read them daily.
Unknowingly, doubt creeps in when we de edify ourselves. This is why we must always hold ourselves in high regard with humility and command respect. You’ll see that the mind can fathom your new belief system.
Please share your challenge with self doubt in the comment section or share a story of how you continue to overcome doubts.
